"A Scent of A Woman" Theory Stinks (Tuesday)

(Start with "Monday" if you can. We're talking about "A Scent of A Woman" all this week and it will be quicker than renting the movie...which...by the way... has nothing to do with this blog anyway.) And if you like this topic, or find me mildly amusing, or just have an extra ten seconds to kill before lunch is delivered, please subscribe. Lots of great updates and tidbits and some future blog-related offers all in one tidy, guaranteed no-spam zone, weekly email.

So, what were we talking about? Oh right. This news report claiming that, well, to put it in a nutshell, guys check out women more when they're at their most fertile.

And this must be, subconsciously, why I finally got married at 39. I've always thought it was because I finally found true love and someone I wished to spend the rest of my life with. Not so. Subconsciously it must have been because I knew I was finished.

I estimate that I was at my most fertile at around 22.  So, now I realize that men apparently stopped checking me out sometime during the Clinton administration. How very ironic. 

So men are attracted to the scent of a woman and my fragrance started evaporating in the '90's. Nice.  Wow, what an insult. This Country really is cruel to its elderly. First they won't check my ID anymore for anything, now they don't even have the decency of undressing me with their eyes.

Of course, you don't even realize that men are no longer trying to get a whiff of you. For years I'd jog past the same construction site at lunch time. They never seemed to be building anything. Just lunching... and for the first couple of years...whistling... and making rude comments. Then...nothing.  I just assumed they'd either had sexual harassment training or anti-slob training or whatever you call it...or maybe they just hired some polite guys.

So how do these guys know exactly when we're ovulating anyway? I mean if they're more attracted to us at that time, they must suspect. And let's face it... some guys are not that perceptive. I mean these people who are supposed to know we're ovulating--aren't they the same ones who don't notice when we get a haircut, wear new clothes or lose weight? 

Supposedly we're the ones who give out some signals. According to this report,women flirt more around that time, and...not sure what this means...lick their lips more.  Okay, I'm not saying all guys are totally oblivious... but I can think of a few...you could lick their lips and they still wouldn't get you were interested.  On that note.......

Listen I gotta go. It's time to do some Spring cleaning. Trust me...it's time. I haven't done one since April... 2005.

I'll talk with ya again tomorrow.