For some unknown reason, I'm pretty secure within myself until I find a product or service that I don't like, then I go running to online reviews to confirm my self-worth. I know I hated the product but I can't say it out loud until an online stranger in the shadows tells me she hated it too: "See? I was right. Jenny B didn't like it either!" "And Fuzzy Navel only gave it one star!" Well, a couple of weeks ago, my husband and I were food shopping and decided, out of nowhere, to try these frozen lactose free, gluten-free, luscious desserts. I chose a chocolate peanut butter flavor. He picked caramel. I took the plunge first that very same night and gave it a whirl. The flavor could have been called: "Mocha almond" or "Strawberry Truffle" or "Turnip & Spinach" because it tasted like nothing. I mean nothing... I should have suspected something was up in the store when I saw that the brand had "Zero" in its name. They didn't even have the decency to include that disappointing taste when you think it's chocolate and it turns out to be carob. I basically paid four bucks for a pint of ice (times two, if the caramel was the same.) So online I went. I have never seen such venom as what came out of these people who commented. "If anyone anywhere ever buys this product, you are an idiot and I will hunt you down!!"... "I should have just eaten the container. At least maybe that would have tasted like something!"... "The people who make this crap should be tied up and forced to eat each and every 'flavor'...twice!" Two weeks after the purchase, after I'd read every single review aloud to my husband, his frozen delight is still sitting unopened in the freezer. "What's the matter, Honey?" I asked him. "Afraid of a little 'ice cream'?" (Look for it on Craig's List.)
It's all his fault. I should never have followed him to the lactose gluten-free section. I have no issues with either lactose or gluten. He claims the same but then again... he's never slept next to himself.