#MicroblogMondays The Penalty for Being Lazy is... A Reward Apparently

I think if I was in elementary school right now, I'd be the most misbehaved kid: The rewards are phenomenal! My niece told me the other day: "Emmanuel in my class wouldn't stop talking so the teacher made him sit by himself and read a book."

What? What can I do to someone or something that I'll be sentenced to sitting by myself and reading a book? All I read are murder mysteries. And I've been reading the same 250 page one for four months. Every time I get a chance to read a chapter, it's been so long, I spend the whole time going back over the last two chapters to remind myself who's related to whom and how they got there. Even still, I usually get to the last few pages, hold my breath in suspense for the murderer to be named and end up saying: "Crap. I never suspected her. I don't even know who that is."

Another punishment at the school is: "She didn't do her homework. Now she has to run a lap at recess."

So, I guess I'm too old for elementary school but I hear the prisons let you sit and read all day and give you an hour a day to exercise. All I usually have time for is to go outside and run up and down my development. It's not a very big development: 70 times around equals a mile.

However, not everything's a punishment at the public schools. If your class collects the most toys during the toy drive for kids living in poverty, you get candy plus either a pizza party or an ice cream party. (Maybe the kids living in poverty do a healthy-food drive for kids living with childhood obesity. The class that collects the most leafy greens gets a field trip to a tanning salon.)

It's not just the schools, of course. The last place I worked was no better. They have a monthly raffle. The prize is the coveted closest parking space to the employee's entrance. So, here you've got a bunch of people who are sitting all day at either their desks, in the cafeteria, or in a bathroom stall. The only exercise most of them ever get is to walk to and from their car. So let's encourage them not to do that. Ironically, I worked at the Health Department.