Sperming without a License and Sexless Reproduction (Thursday)

(Start with "Monday" if you can. Unless you haven't run out and gotten that hoochy Halloween costume you've been meaning to buy, then go do that. Priorities, woman, priorities.) So, what were we talking about? Oh right. There were those two guys in England who finally went to court on charges of "Selling Sperm without a License." (I wonder if you can get pulled over for that.)

An online service, they provided the sperm donor for women in need of one and who were willing to inseminate themselves. (Gd bless these gals. My hand would be shaking if I ever tried to cut my own hair let alone set millions of sperm free into my lower regions.)

The company was called Sperm Exchange or Grope for Hope or something similar. I imagine as their business increased so did the sales of "A Woman Without A Man, Is Like A Fish Without A Bicycle" T-shirts.

I want to say all these guys got was a "slap on the wrist" but that would sound like I'm somehow approaching yet another naughty pun. So let's just say they got no jail time.

They were each fined and sentenced to perform 200 hours of "unpaid work". I'm not sure what that last part means. I'm not sure I want to know. What's say they'll be cleaning up parks around England and leave it at that?  

The reason cited for these fellas not getting any jail time is they were the first to be tried in this type of case and there really were, from what I understand, no laws in place regarding what to do with people selling sperm online.

So that got me thinking back to other and all infertility firsts and Louise Brown, the first IVF baby born who we discussed last week.

Her parents must have had some guts. Or they probably were just desperate like the rest of us. They had been trying to conceive for nine years before IVF came along.

I say they had guts because how many things do we really want to feel like we're the guinea pigs for?

My Dad always said he would never buy a car the first year it was out. He'd just as soon avoid the drive into the ditch and let other people discover the faulty power steering issue.

Just like when I want to try a new hair stylist person. I try to con a friend of mine with similar hair to take a chance first. Though that's backfired on me more than once.

Also...I have no idea how I'm going to put this delicately: But look at the improvement in sex change operations. Some of the earlier males who became females looked... I hope you can see what I mean. It's about as far as I can venture without hurting somebody's feelings.  

Listen I gotta go.  There's a new proposal to build a highway that would come through my driveway. (True) I've got to read up on our options. Should we wait to see how much the County will pay us? Or sell to the first person who offers us a tunafish sandwich and a side of fries?

I'll talk with ya again tomorrow.