Spring Break: Do Infertile People Ever Get A Break? (Thursday)

(Start with "Monday" if you can. If you're a college basketball fan, or a Spring Break fan, starting this blog from "Monday" is just another wonderful way of stretching out the month...And if you can bear a little more, please do subscribe for weekly updates, info, offers, and wacky me.) So, what were we talking about? Oh right. How desperately infertiles could use a crazy, wild, Spring Break. But the idea of us on Spring Break, like a college-esque Spring Break... is really quite disturbing if you think about it.

I could just picture all of us happy gals getting together for Spring Break. All of us...thousands... of us...in one big sorority-like house: The Delta Gamma Gametes. It's a reality show, I for one...would be afraid to watch. How long do you think it would be before our "House of Fun" became a "Fun House"...like at a carnival? Or do I mean "House of Horrors"? 

I think everything would start out all warm and fuzzy and chummy and supportive. Then, slowly but surely, we would lose that lovin' feeling. And nobody would be able to stop the destruction.

The treatments, the overwhelming feelings of our situations...Pretty soon we'd become "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Hormones."

"You people just don't understand what I'm going through! Oh wait. Yeah, you're going through it too. I forgot. So then if you do know what I'm going through, why don't you know that I just want you to go away and leave me alone?!"

"I know we all hate when people talk about their kids in front of us, so we're all supposed to be on vacation here. Why are we all sitting around talking about how we hate to talk about other people's kids?"

"I know it's horrible that you've been going through this for two years...and I do feel for you...I really do...but I've been going through this for two and a half years!"

"Two and a half years?! OMG. If I have to go through this for another six months I'll kill myself!" 

"Thanks a lot! I've been going through this for six years."

"Really? Well, I've been going through this for six years AND I've had two surgeries and three IUI's."

"Well, I've had two surgeries, four IUI's and one IVF!"

"And if you guys are going to throw Baby Dust at each other, which I think is great... could you at least clean it up when you're done? I don't mean to complain, it's just that I feel like I'm the only one around here using the Dust Buster."     

Husbands would be on the vacation too... in a separate wing of the house. Way over there. Just them, air conditioning, big screen TV's, 24 hour open bar, pool tables, stocked refrigerators, two toilets each... and sound-proof walls. 

Listen I gotta go. Every week at this time I moan about American Idol and beg you not to tell me anything because I taped it. I don't even like it this year...Isn't that the first sign of addiction? When you get no joy out of something anymore...and yet you still can't keep yourself from doing it over and over? 

I'll talk with ya again tomorrow.