(Start with "Monday" if you can. I'm just back from vacation this week, so if the posts are terrible I can't really blame it on exhaustion. Let me know if I need to seek another excuse will ya?) So, what were we talking about? Oh right. The new study that says that stress doesn't hurt our chances of getting pregnant via fertility treatments. If you've been in the thick of treatments for a while, let me ask you this: That very first day when you set foot into a fertility clinic..think back..think way way back... If you knew at the very beginning of it all that stress couldn't do diddly to keep you from getting pregnant...What would you have done differently?
I would have pinched my doctor's horrible little assistant's horrible little face. And I don't mean an "Aw you're so cute" pinch. I mean a "There! Take that!" pinch. She was just horrible for the sake of being horrible. She was a peach in front of the doctor but wouldn't answer his phones or give him messages or call you back. So I would have spent the night in jail. May have even stressed me out. Wouldn't affect my chances of getting pregnant.
I wouldn't have paid my bill. Screw it. I just gave myself a scholarship. Yeah, I owe you fourteen thousand dollars. Send me an invoice...To my P.O. Box. Or have your collection agency harass me every hour on the hour...Yes, that would be stressful for me. Wouldn't affect my chances of getting pregnant. (okay, they wouldn't let me leave each visit without paying as I went...They somehow knew not to trust me. Maybe the billing person has a cousin who works for American Express... Or compiles credit scores.)
I would have stuck my Human Resources manager's pin head into her own pencil sharpener for being not only the one who chose our worthless company health plan, but also the one who issued me a warning every time I was ten minutes late coming back from my doctor's appointments. So, yeah, I would have been fired. And I would have had no money to live. Starving to death would have been stressful. It wouldn't affect my chances of getting pregnant.
I would have packed up all my things sold my house and trekked through the Himalayas.
Oh wait. This whole blog, have you been getting the same feeling that just came to me now? I think I'm confusing "Stress not affecting my chances of getting pregnant" with "Only having three days to live."
Listen, I gotta go. My vacation has totally worn off. I have to start planning the next one.
I'll talk with ya again on Monday.